My Qoop

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Three Minute Management Course

Lesson 1:
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor.
Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that towel." After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves.
The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When shegets to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was that?"
"It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies.
"Great!" the husband says, "did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?"
Moral of the story : If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to preventavoidable exposure.

Lesson 2:
A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing hergown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak." Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way .
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.

Lesson 3:
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish."
"Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas , driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Puff! She's gone.
"Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii , relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life." Puff! He's gone.
"OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."
Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.

Lesson 4:
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit sawthe eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?" The eagle answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

Lesson 5:
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree."
Moral of the story: Bull shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

Lesson 6:
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate Followingthe sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Moral of the story:
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) When you're warm & happy in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

How to Live on 24 Hours a Day - Arnold Bennett Quotes

“The chances are that you have already come to believe that happiness in unattainable. But men have attained it. And they have attained it by realizing that happiness does not spring from the procuring of physical or mental pleasure, but from the development of reason and the adjustment of conduct to principles.”

“My contention is that the full use of those seven-and-a-half hours will quicken the whole life of the week, add zest to it, and increase the interest which you feel in even themost banal occupations. You practise physical exercises for a mere ten minutes morning and evening, and yet you are not astonished when your physical health and strength are beneficially affected every hour of the day, and your whole physical outlook changed. Why should you be astonished that an average of over an hour a day given to the mind should permanently and completely enliven the whole activity of the mind?”

“Art is a great thing. But it is not the greatest. The most important of all perceptions is the continual perception of cause and effect--in other words, the perception of the continuous development of the universe--in still other words, the perception of the course of evolution.
When one has thoroughly got imbued into one's head the leading truth that nothing happens without a cause, one grows not only large-minded, but large-hearted.”

“I suggest no particular work as a start. The attempt would be futile in the space of my command. But I have two general suggestions of a certain importance. The first is to define the direction and scope of your efforts. Choose a limited period, or a limited subject, or a single author. Say to yourself: "I will know something about the French Revolution, or the rise of railways, or the works of John Keats." And during a given period, to be settled beforehand, confine yourself to your choice. There is much pleasure to be derived from being a specialist.”

“Unless you give at least forty-five minutes to careful, fatiguing reflection (it is an awful bore at first) upon what you are reading, your ninety minutes of a night are chiefly wasted. This means that your pace will be slow.”

Endurance

Viii
The timing of this later voyage could not have been worse. The world was plunged into war at midnight on August 8, 1914, the same day the Endurance sailed from Plymouth.

P. 13
Fortitudine vincimus – “By endurance we conquer”

P. 17
*Though Shackleton bought the Endurance for $67,000, the Framnaes shipyard today (1959) would not undertake to build a similar vessel for less than $700,000 – and the cost might well run to $ 1 million, they estimate.

P. 51
Late in the evening, the men on deck saw a band of about ten emperor penguins; they waddled slowly up toward the ship, then stopped a short distance away. Emperors, singly or in pairs, were a common sight, but nobody had ever seen so large a group before. The penguins stood for a moment watching the tortured ship, then raised their heads and uttered a series of weird, mournful, dirgelike cries. It was all the more eerie because none of the men – not even the Antarctic veterans among them – had ever before heard penguins voice anything except the most elemental, croaking sorts of noises.
The sailors stopped what they were doing, and old Ton McLeod turned to Macklin. “Do you hear that?” he asked. “We’ll none of us get back to our homes again.”

P. 55
May the Lord help you to do your duty and guide you through all the dangers by land and sea.
May you see the works of the Lord and all His wonders in the deep.

P. 56
Nevertheless, there was a remarkable absence of discouragement. All the men were in a dazed state of fatigue, and nobody paused to reflect on the terrible consequences of losing their ship. Nor were they upset by the fact that they were now camped on a piece of ice perhaps six feet thick. It was a haven compared with the nightmare of labor and uncertainty of the last days on the Endurance. It was quite enough to be alive – and they were merely doing what they had to do to stay that way.
There was even a trace of mild exhilaration in their attitude. At least they had a clear-cut task ahead of them. The nine months of indecision, of speculation about what might happen, of aimless drifting with the pack over. Now they simply had to get themselves out, however appallingly difficult that might be.

P. 57
After he had spoken, he reached under his parka and took out a gold cigarette case and several gold sovereigns and threw them into the snow at his feet.
Then he opened the Bible Queen Alexandra had given them and ripped out the flyleaf and the page containing the Twenty-third Psalm. He also tore out the page from the book of Job with this verse on it:

Out of whose womb came the ice?
And the hoary frost of Heaven, who hath gendered it?
The waters are hid as with a stone.
And the face of the deep is frozen.

And he laid the Bible in the snow and walked away.
It was a dramatic gesture, but that was the way Shackleton wanted it. From studying the outcome of past expeditions, he believed that those who burdened themselves with equipment to meet every contingency had fared much worse than those who had sacrificed total preparedness for speed.

P. 64
Though he was virtually fearless in the physical sense, he suffered an almost pathological dread of losing control of the situation. In part, this attitude grew out of a consuming sense of responsibility. He felt he had gotten them into their situation, and it was his responsibility to get them out. As a consequence, he was intensely watchful for potential trouble-makers who might nibble away at the unity of the group. Shackleton felt that if dissention arose, the party as a whole might not put forth that added ounce of energy which could mean, at a time of crisis, the difference between survival and defeat. Thus, he was prepared to go to almost any length to keep the party close-knit and under his control.

P. 65
Hudson was just as had always been, simple and a little irritating. His attempts at humor were often more foolish than funny because he lacked perception. He was a young dandy, a little impressed with his own good looks but really not too sure of himself. As a result of this fundamental insecurity, he was quite self-centered and a poor listener. He could be counted on to interrupt any conversation to inject something about himself—even though what he said bore no relation to the subject being discussed. And his self-centeredness made it difficult for him to tell when his leg was being pulled, as was the case in the practical joke from which he got his nickname, Buddha. Strangely, he seemed to enjoy a joke on himself—at least it gave him the chance to occupy center stage. Shackleton was not fond at all of Hudson, but he preferred putting up with him to inflicting him on others.

P.104
A sense of mounting desperation began to infect them. James wrote on the following day: “Something decisive must occur soon, and whatever it may be will be preferable to continued inactivity. This is our fifth month since our shipwreck. When we left, we were going to be ashore in a month! ‘Man proposes—‘ * applies here with a vengeance.”

* For some reason, James omitted the last portion of the quotation: “Man proposes, God disposes.”

P.106
There were some intrepid attempts to make jokes about cannibalism. “Greenstreet and I,” wrote Worsley, “amuse ourselves at Marston’s expense. Marston is the plumpest man in the camp, and we become very solicitous about his welfare and condition, making a great show of generosity by offering him old penguin bones that we have gnawed till there is nothing left. We implore him not to get too thin and even go as far as to select chops, etc., off him and quarrel about who shall have the tenderest part. Finally, he gets so disgusted with us that whenever he sees us approaching he turns and walks away.”

P.118
Throughout the night, the hoarse croaking of the penguins, punctuated by the explosive sound of schools of whales blowing, created almost a din. When dawn finally came, the weather was clear and bright, with a moderate westerly wind blowing. Once again the men could see Clarence Island, and to the left of it, very faintly, the chain of peaks on Elephant Island. Worsley counted ten of them.

P. 123
The James Caird was in the lead with Shackleton at the tiller. So far as the ice permitted he set a course for the northwest. Next came Worsley steering the Dudley Docker, then Hudson in the Stancomb Wills. The sound of their voices chanting, “stroke…stroke…stroke…”mingled with the cries of the birds overhead and the surge of the swell through the pack. With each stroke, the oarsman fell more into the rhythm of their task.

P. 150
“Blackboro,” he shouted in the darkness.
“Here, sir,” Blackboro replied.
“We shall be on Elephant Island tomorrow,” Shackleton yelled. “no one has ever landed there before, and you will be the first ashore.”
Blackboro did not answer.

P. 200
Then, too, there were the reindeer hairs. They moulted from the insides of the sleeping bags, and at first they had been only a petty annoyance. But no matter how much hair was shed, the supply seemed inexhaustible. And they were everywhere—the sides of the boat, the seats, the ballast. They clung set in clumps to faces and hands. The men breathed them as they slept and occasionally woke up choking on them. The hairs ran down in the bottom and clogged the pump, and little clusters of them were turning up more and more frequently in the food.

Part of the Afterword:

On the earth, nations will be in anguish and perplexity at the roaring and tossing of the sea. Men will faint from terror, apprehensive of what is coming on the world, for the heavenly bodies will be shaken. At that time they will see the Son of Man coming in a cloud with power and great glory. When these things begin to take place, stand up and lift up your heads, because your redemption is drawing near. Luke 21:25-28, NIV

Lansing, Alfred. 1959. Endurance: Shackleton’s Incredible Voyage. First Tyndale House edition (1999). United States.

Quotes from a Wise man - Jack Handey

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." and if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "probably because of something you did".

If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.

To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kinda scary. I've wondered where this started, and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus and a clown killed my dad.

As I bit into the nectarine, it had a crisp, juiciness about it that was very pleasurable -- until I realized it wasn't a nectarine at all, but a HUMAN HEAD!!

If you're in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those small pumpkins. Maybe it'll make everyone think how stupid war is, and while they are thinking, you can throw a real grenade at them.

It's true that every time you hear a bell, an angel gets its wings. But what they don't tell you is that every time you hear a mouse trap snap, an Angel gets set on fire.

Contrary to popular belief, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. The most dangerous animal is a shark riding on an elephant, just trampling and eating everything they see.

Quotes from Robert Nozick's - The Examined Life

A Portrait vs. a Photograph

Why is it that no photograph of a person has a depth a painted portrait can have? The two embody different quantities of time. A photograph is a “snapshot,” whether or not it was posed; it shows one particular moment of time and what the person looked like right then, what his surface showed. During the extended hours a painting is sat for, though, its subject shows a range of traits, emotions, and thoughts, all revealed in differing lights. P.13

Focus

Still, when all other things are equal, the more concentrated thought goes into making something, the more it is shaped, enriched, and laden with significance. So too with living a life. P.14

The Purpose of Behaving Ethically

The philosophical tradition since Plato has sought to ground ethics by showing that our own well-being is served or enhanced by behaving ethically. P.16

What is our Purpose?

Does the desire somehow to survive physical death stem from the desire to have a larger purpose than we can find for ourselves on earth, another task we are to perform in another realm? We might think we each have the task here of making a soul for ourselves – souls might not be things we are born with – a task made more difficult by not knowing exactly what that soul is for. Perhaps it is more than our own individual souls we are to make, more even than a mosaic of souls together. P.25


Nozick, Robert. The Examined Life: Philosophical Meditations. 1989. First Simon & Schuster Paperbacks: United States.

My Mission Statement

My mission is to improve and enhance the abilities, relationships, welfare, and well-being of myself and others around me, while providing service to my country and those in need.

What Makes a Leader

From the article, “What Makes a Leader?”, Daniel Goleman reveals particular qualities associated with what he calls “self-regulation” (Goleman, 1998.). Qualities such as: trustworthiness and integrity, comfort with ambiguity, and openness to change” (Goleman, 1998), all stem from having a system or set of standards to rely upon. Having the confidence in making decisions come almost naturally once the results are established. The faith in this system allows one to exhibit behavior associated with leaders without having to think about them. Of the last two qualities mentioned above, both have the common anxiety many feel with change and ambiguity; it is the fear of the unknown. In each case, this new situation can lead to the thought that one may not be able to handle and overcome the obstacle. By keeping one’s set of principles at heart offers a stable platform and handrail to follow and assist: thus, the confidence in a new situation next time is present from the knowledge that the same method will work again.

Write a personal Mission Statement

Write a mission statement for yourself. Typically, businesses use a mission statement to determine what their goals are as a business entity. A good mission statement receives input from company employees that comprise the organization. Try doing one for yourself; seriously try to articulate a defined goal for what you want to do with your life. It is a bit more intensive than what you would initially think. I had to do one for one of my graduate courses and it was worth the effort. Compare it to your actions after you have defined your statement and see if it still rings true. It’s a way to get a better look at who you are. I have learned a few things from the one I created a few years back.

Terrorist Hunter

I was introduced to this book through a seminar I attended a few years ago. I have only just recently gotten around to reading it. It deals with a woman telling her story of being an Iraqi born Jew living in the United States. She discovers a huge discrepancy in a number of Islamic non-profit and religious pamphlets. Each pamphlet asking for donations are written in English and Arabic, but there are significant differences in the messages being said between each language. True information about the organization’s affiliation and purpose are omitted in the English version, but is clearly expressed in the Arabic side. From living in the Middle East, she instantly knows the organizations the leaflet lists are all huge supporters of Hamas and al­-Qaeda.
This book tells her story of going under cover to conferences that these groups sponsor for fundraising here in the United States. I have found very interesting, but at the same time equally revolting. It makes me sick with anger that these groups operate freely in the U.S. to support acts of terrorism that continue to kill our soldiers abroad.
My intent for this entry is to increase awareness of these activities that continue to operate in our country. Google some of the names on the list below. You might be surprised on what you may find with them. These names represent the same cowards that are responsible for 9/11 and the suicide bombings all over the world for the last 10 years. When I first started this book, I thought it would be a good way to learn more about how the terrorist networks operate, but unlike the pleasure I get from learning in other subjects, this book has become a painful chore to me. I hope that my effort in making this blog entry contributes (however in small measure) to ending terrorist fund raising in our country.

The following organizations listed below are affiliated with Islamic Extremism (terrorism). Of the organizations listed, the book supports every group listed by an overwhelming pile of evidence showing ties to people known for terrorist activities and giving speeches promoting the killing of Americans and Jews. These are just a few organizations from Terrorist Hunter.

Islamic American University (Southfield MI)
Dar al-Hijra Mosque (Falls Church VA) –
Nike Corp. also donated $70,000. for the church’s playground
Islamic Committee for Palestine (ICP)
World and Islam Studies Enterprise (WISE)
Palestinian Islamic Jihad (PIJ)


Anonymous. 2003. Terrorist Hunter. New York: HarperCollins Publishers.